Heatstroke

1st June (Monday) - These few days, we are having major ultraviolet, in other words, sunburns.  I've been shivering on and off, hot and cold, sometimes breaking into chilly sweats for no reason as though I'm having hypoglcemia (low blood sugar). Apparently I've been suffering heatstrokes. So not good. Not good.
These days I felt really weak and fatigue. Not during worktimes, but when I go out, especially to crowded areas. Sigh, not all the Vitamin C and E can help me out in this. Not even the air conditioning unit can save from the heat. To maintain my weight, I went on a vigorous diet that involves warm lemon water, soya based milk, Vitamin C and E, chlorophyll, Not to mention the exercises I'm taking up.Anything I take nowadays goes into my waistline. ==
Most of my patients were ignorant about sunblock. Clearly, they haven't seen Hugh Jackman's lecture on the importance of sunblock. Seriously, the many cases of fractional laser ablation we had done... Most of them were like, "Oh, I can go back to my usual activity.without much worry." Uh, no, you can't. After any aesthetic treatment, your skin will be sensitive. Do not take things like sunblock too lightly. If you don't apply sunblock on your sensitive skin, dark pigmentations will re-emerge. Then you'll end up spending more on second treatment. And no cheap sunblocks allowed. According to my doctor, the best will be SPF 50. And if you are going out, please make sure to get a wide brim hat and umbrella to shield your face from the ultraviolet lights. And shocking news, apparently, the indoor lights of your office also has ultraviolet. Oh my goodness. Shocking, but true. Not it's not dangerous, but long term exposure to the lights like computers can cause uneven skin tone. Hoo boy. No wonder why sunblocks are selling like hotcakes. And that is why I'm also now putting moisturiser plus sunblock, it's a 2 in 1 so I actually saved up a little on the sunblock cost.
Regarding about cases, there's not much to say, most of it were the same, but I finally get to see hair removal. Here's the thing: Permanent Hair Removal is not permanent. Many of my patients complained that they went to do permanent hair removal but they kept getting some hair back. So far, hair removal is not permanent. What we offer is hair growth reduction, which means we can use laser to laser off most of your hair, but there will be a few strands sprouting out, and it's not hundred percent guarantee, depending on the severity of your hair growth. There are some people who come back and tell me it's not effective, but there are some who said it was effective and they only got a few strands poking out. If you are going for armpit hair removal, I won't recommend it. With the blistering heat, hair are your best friend for filtering the sweat.
Tome for me to go to bed, it's going to be very busy tomorrow.

Struggling Hands On

23rd May (Saturday) - It's already nearly going to be the end of May, hence my 3rd month. In other words, nearly end of my probation, hence I'm now doing all I can to prove to the higher ups that I'm committed to the job. And since this department it's so much better than my last one, with supportive colleagues and allowing me to read cosmetic magazines to keep up to date to the latest treatments, so it isn't all work and no play.

Besides finding my newfound love for chess, I'm now allowed to do things hands on, under supervision of course, but I'm allowed to do things on my own now, but under assessment. I don't mind, as long I'm able to pass probation.

I gotten a list of what I needed to do, so I just followed exactly on the list, but doing proper hands on it's really a struggle. Don't think giving facials is something like a walk in the park, once you hands on, you'll know how tough it is to clean the sticky clay mask that is stuck on. Not to mention the bursting acnes, I tell you, moments later my gauze were soaked with blood. Ah, I thought I gave the blood up when I left the ward, but I guess when you're in my line of work, you can never escape from the crimson fluid that smells of meat and copper.

I'm now on strict assessment which means I'm doing hands on from A to Z, and assisting the doctors with the laser machines. Last time I'm doing on and off helping, so now it's time to prove my worth. I'm not really that good with machines, but it's okay to take baby steps, but I have to pick up fast. Most of the procedures are more or less the same, but with few twists depending on the doctors and procedure. But I'm slowly getting the hang of it. A very nice change I must say.

There's really not much to say at this point, except can I just say, the amount of money people throw just to maintain their beauty is really ridiculous, but as the doctors told me, you have to start maintaining your beauty at a young age if you want to age beautifully. 

Kickout

7th May (Thursday) - It wasn't a very hectic day, compared to last week where there were many ladies anxious to get their treatment done. After settling my last patient with a chemical peel and giving her strict instructions (SUNBLOCK), I went to attend a self-defense workshop. I have a black belt 1st dan in karate, but deep down, I know it isn't going to help out in the real world, where criminal starts attacking you in a ruthless manner. There are many people who actually are expert in martial arts like kickboxing, taekwando, karate, jujitsu and such, but when someone comes at you with a knife, you tend to freeze.
Well, I signed up for this 2 hour and a half workshop and let me tell you, this organization is good. Seriously. I know we tend to get down fighting back like you usually see in movies, but in real life, you'll end up getting hurt and that's not worth it. The guy who conducted the workshop showed us real life scenes where people fought back to stop the thief from grabbing at their belongings. That's the WORST mistake ever. You end up getting seriously hurt, and all for the sake of trying to keep your belongings. I can see why people often say when someone demands you to hand over all your belongings, you just do it without a second thought. Except nowadays there are types who attempt to take your lives.
One thing that you have to take note is not that all self-defense techniques are foolproof. Self-defense is about keeping yourself aware and on guard. People always jump into the assumption of, "You carry Louis Vuitton, Guccis and Pradas, of course you'll get robbed.", "You are wearing so sexy, of course you'll get targeted." Uh uh. Wrong. So wrong. The organization had actually interviewed former criminals and they all said the exact same thing, they only attack when you least expect it. And worse part, it only takes 3 seconds. We actually counted as we watched real life scenarios. 1,2,3. Poof. Window smashed, items snatched, mission accomplished. Scary.
How to make protect yourself? The only way is by reducing the risks. Most of it is common sense, like don't stay out too late, don't make your daily routines a habit, don't go around bad parts of the town... But in worse case scenario, say you are really cornered, you use your body mechanisms to breakaway and escape. Yes, that's right. No need for fancy martial arts techniques. Just break out and run. Your life is worth it, hold on to it.
We were even tested out one on one, where the speaker assault us like how a real criminal would, grab, choke, corner, all those. Me? I got several chokes, and after the session, my throat hurts and it's sore. The silver lining, we got a real life experience of how it feels so that we will be much more prepared in future, and we got free tea and chocolates. So yeah. The workshop was really worth it.    

Irie

4th May (Monday) - It's already May. Where has the time gone? Hard to believe that we're nearly half a year now. And so many things had happened in between the days when I haven't been posting things up.
I took my psychologist's advice on getting a pet as a therapy. After my sister's Shih Tzu, I also managed to get a pet of my own as well. She's like my baby, and she's a poodle so I don't have to worry about any furry allergies. I used to have allergies with Shih Tzu but not anymore, but I'm still not willing to take the risk. Having bought her from a breeder, she's in a really poor condition. She's severely malnourished to the point where she's so weak that she couldn't even move. The breeder was a cheater, telling us that she's in good health, and that she's three months old. B.S. Sorry to say. My sister's Shih Tzu is three months old, already had her first jab, and she can run, jump, stand and eat. I was so worried that I rushed her to the vet and do you know what they said. She's severely malnourished that she's nothing but skin and bone. She has no vaccination yet, her teeth aren't fully grown, she can barely move, and worst of all, she has TICKS. Fat ones too. The cheat. He was going on and on that he has more than 7 dogs and that none of them are in poor condition. But honestly speaking, if you have more than 7 dogs, food are limited and of course, you will tend to feed in minimal amount so that you don't keep running out for dog food every few weeks. The vet told me to put her on supplements and to force her to eat small frequent meals. Plus exercising her.
I did what the vet said, and after several prayers to Buddha during Wesak, my prayers came true. She's getting a little better, but she still tends to slip and fall, like a baby taking her first few steps. The vet estimated her to be around one to two months, but certainly not three months. That, I can accept why she's having a difficult time in walking.
Giving her a name was little tough. Originally my first choice was Phoebe, so that it sounded a little like Fifi, then Elmo, because she has reddish brown fur. But she's a girl, and calling Elmo will be really awkward. Then to Kimiko (Definition :upright, righteous), somehow it didn't seem right. As I was pondering with preparing her new home, this name seemed to kept coming to me. Irie (入江). It means alright in Jamaican Patois, powerful, excellent and great. But my main reason for choosing the name is because it's a Japanese name, which means bay. And she loves it.
Being in the aesthetic side really helped me out a lot. Dogs are like human beings, they need proper grooming and exercise besides the daily need like food and water. Even dental hygeine is important. I found toothbrushes for dog use but since she's still a baby so there;s no need for it yet, but she's going to need it, one day. I got her a dingling toy and a warm blanket for her in case she's cold. So in a way, now my hands are full taking care of her. Once I gotten the hang of her, I'll update more often.
And a happy birthday to my beloved friend, who is like a twin sister to me.

One Week Past

23rd April (Thursday) - One week, that's how much the time has flew. I picked up on so much things since then but I'm still learning. I'm taking things slow, like how the doctor and psychologists advised me. Baby steps. I'm not ready to rush into things yet, and everyone were right. By focusing on my daily routine assignment, I'm able to make small, but slow steady progress. I managed to remember all the products prices, as evidenced by some of the comments I received from the other girls. Well, I had good mentors who are guiding me and answering all of my endless questions.
Today was a little scary cause you see, I'm only okay, about so-so in chemical peeling, but for biopsies and lasers, well, I'm not confident enough yet, but no one is pushing me on the choo choo express. It's just that today is rather rushed. With 5 cases and only 3 of us on duty, we had to run around, and all of them are different varieties. For some reason, the whole hospital is full that they ended up shoving to our side as well. Despite I haven't assisted much in cases, just merely an observant, I'm also shoved to the front lines as per doctor's request. I can't do anything, patients were waiting, and my mentors are busy. One handling paperworks, one handling another doctor. So just left me. Armed with my wits, I tried to keep an open mind, and it paid off. By listening to the doctor's orders and keeping all of my senses open, I'm able to handle her smoothly instead of shaking like a leaf.  In a way, I felt good, cause at last, I'm able to be useful, despite trying to market products and such. I could probably list out all the things that I had learnt so far but I don't want to bore people to tears with facts. But let's just say I picked up a lot of really awesome tips from colleagues and doctors alike. Maybe, just maybe I found a place where I can truly belong.
This is not like back in my previous experience where things can be shared easily. Where I am currently at is rather slow paced, but it's also a rather fun place because it's relaxing, and while you can pick up things slow, you need to put in a 120% effort to remember all the things you had done and be on constant alert, kinda like a bodyguard. Crime had been increasing rapidly at my workplace area to the point where it is labeled a black spot, which means constant awareness. I would love to share the many things I had learnt but right now, I'm really beat. Exhausted but satisfied. And now I would just like to say, See you again, and expect more updates whenever I'm free to pour out my feelings... (I love that song...)  

Clean Slate

Soft hues of sapphire from the orient,

collecting gently, marked the circles now

of skies serene from height to horizon.

And this sight - once I left the morbid air,

which weighed so heavy on my eyes and heart - 

began afresh to bring my eyes delight.

Canto 1, Purgatorio 

19th April (Sunday) - Hello folks. After 10 days of MC, I'm back, recharged, re-energized and ready to start a brand new day of work in a brand new department for the past three days. I will admit, it's a little scary to be at a new environment, because it's a whole new thing, to start fresh, and the scariest part was... I given up my old department to work at a beauty centre, where beauty is the highest priority. I have no clue how to use cleanser, toner, moisturiser and stuff. This is all Becky Bloomwood's field, I'm afraid, but it's also thanks to Shopaholic that I roughly know what are the products for. Let's just say I'm not exactly a girly sort of person, as in I never really bother with make up because my skin is highly sensitive to chemical products. But that's the least of my worries because all I need to make sure is I do my job well and make some profit aka marketing. Mmm, okay.
The therapy sessions has been helping out as well. I don't find myself feeling claustrophobic much whenever I'm working now, and things don't seem to hit me in the wrong way as before. And the one thing I love about my new job was that I get to read. Oh yes, read. Fashion and cosmetic magazines to keep up to date of the latest cosmetic surgeries and beauty treatments. Seeing as how a magazine had never passed by me before, I had a lot of catching up to do.
The Sister told me to take things slow so I did. And that's how I find myself being at peace. She gave me a small list of things to do and I have to hand in a small report each day. Suddenly, I find myself being able to slowly pick things up along the way, and I had new colleagues who are wonderfully supportive and are willing to put up with my pestering. Treatments are usually the main thing in our department because everyone wants beauty. Who doesn't? Not just for the ladies but for the men as well. Who doesn't want to maintain their youthful appearance?
Many of the patients, as I was informed, are regular patients who comes for treatments. Of course. To maintain beauty means you have to be willing to spend high costs for treatments and the products. As the doctor put it bluntly to me, "Anything that is cheap is absolute rubbish." Well, she has a point. For the sake of saving twenty to thirty dollars, people are willing to buy cheap cosmetics products, and ended up paying more because of the damage done to their face. I guess that's what she meant, because sometimes things that comes in cheap doesn't necessarily means it's good. Who knows what chemical they have mixed in.
I would love to update more but so far things had been slow because of the GST implementation. But hopefully once things are fully settled I'll be able to post more. Until next time.  

R&R

"Why are you even a nurse? You're not cut out to be one."

"Why don't you just be a writer since you're so good at writing?"

"Perhaps you should work in a magazine seeing as how you're so worthless in your job and all."

"Can't you work faster?! God, patients can't wait!"

"How did you even become a nurse anyway? Not through passion I guess."

8th April (Wednesday) - Awful awful awful. The two sessions of psychology therapy determined me that I have to see a psychiatrist. Yep, a real psychiatrist, because according to the report, I was depressed. Yes, depressed. Sigh. the above statements that you see above are what people commented about me. I wonder about that too sometime. But one thing I'll admit with what pride I have left, I got through those 3 years of flaming hell with determination and support from my tutors, whom I might add, were super supportive and encouraging, asking me not to give up and balance my nursing and writing. That's how I got my license in the end. Not through luck, but by willpower, sheer determination and life blood. Like it or not, I came out as a nurse, and that's what I'll be.
Regarding about my writing, yes, my dream is to be a writer, like the amazing authors like J.K. Rowling, L.J. Smith, Anthony Horowitz, Meg Cabot, Sophie Kinsella, Cornelia Funke, Benedict Jacka and many others whom had inspired me in writing. But let me point out, all these amazing authors weren't originally authors at first. J.K. Rowling took up teaching, Anthony Horowitz did screenwriting for media and such, Meg Cabot used to be an illustrator and Sophie Kinsella used to be a financial journalist. Can't it be the same for me? Doing nursing as my main job and then my writing after work? No, apparently there were some people asking me to abandon my nursing job or work in a MAGAZINE. Sorry to say, not many of us are lucky stars in the world of writing, and majority writers actually took up other odd jobs before converting to full time writing.
So I met the psychiatrist with my dad (Well, my whole family had knew about my whole mental health now since I spilled the beans after Cheng Meng), and after much discussion with the psychiatrist, my dad, and my boss and the management, everyone agreed that I needed some time off. So the psychiatrist gave me a week MC to "REST, RELAX, AND DON'T THINK OF WORK" as he put it. He even asked my dad to get me a pet to occupy my mind, and my dad finally, after much insistence, agreed to get a puppy for me to occupy my mind with instead of me going around talking to my mom's bonsai plants.
I do have to take my meds as well, nothing serious, just anti-depressants and sleeping pills, and all the while being at home, reading, writing, drawing, listening to my old records of Michael Jackson and Gorillaz and such, something to keep me occupied as the psychiatrist kept saying to me. It's already Wednesday since he last gave me my break on Monday, and I think slowly, I'm feeling relaxed and calmer than last time.